Wow. I just got off the phone with a terrified mother who is in the hospital pregnant with the second of her twins after delivering the first last week at 24 weeks, 1 day. It brought back so many emotions - I remember being there. I remember not wanting to connect with the baby in the NICU for fear my heart would soon be broken if he didn't come home.
Whew. Rough call - I had no idea what to say. I wanted to ask her if she had named him yet. I wanted to tell her that she needed to be attached and spend some time and take that risk - because if he doesn't come home, she will never forgive herself that she won't have the opportunity to do it in the future. But I wouldn't have been ready to hear that a week after giving birth to Chomps.
Mr. was such a rock-star. He loved that boy and cheered him on and it was all but miraculous how calm Chompy was when he was around. I sometimes feel guilty that Mr. basically had to go through that alone because I was so unavailable obsessing on how I can take care of the two boys inside since that was all I had control over.
How I wish I would have had my Faith then. Big F Faith. Not "I was raised in the church and went through the motions until I was old enough to rebel" faith. But the "I know God will be with me no matter with happens" Faith. How much more comforted I would have been. I pray she has that.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Background
After years "off" - I am going to start blogging again. I am going to try to do so as anonymously as possible to protect my family. I won't be using my kids' names and I would hope that in the comments, those who know us won't either.
Let me introduce myself... I am Mrs. McB, Married to Mr. McB. Mr. would say it was love at first site. I thought he was weird and gross. For a while. We were married in 2002 at a wedding we heard over and over was the best ever. I tend to agree. :) We moved in to our house on our first anniversary and life was amazing.
It wasn't long into our marriage that we wanted a baby and tried for a year or so to no avail. With very minimal infertility treatment we found ourselves pregnant in May of 2004. We were thrilled that, after seeking help from a doctor, we were pregnant so quickly.
On May 23, 2004 Mr. McB was in an accident at work. This accident could have been very, very bad (as in me raising this baby alone or much more serious injury) but he ended up with a severely injured left leg which was amputated above the knee later that night. Four days later I went to my first ultrasound alone at 6 weeks pregnant and we found out we were pregnant with triplets. At any other time in our lives I'm not sure how that news would have been received. But we desperately needed some good news after Mr.'s accident and this was 3x the good news as far as we were concerned.
My pregnancy was riddled with complication and Mr. was obviously dealing with his own recovery from his surgery and new life with a prosthetic leg. We took turns puking and feeling sorry for ourselves the summer of 2004.
Chomps, our oldest, was apparently really eager to meet us. He was born at 23 weeks 3 days (a healthy pregnancy lasts 40 weeks) in September 2004. At that point we were really unsure about the future. Mr.'s take was different than mine and he was confident Chomps would make it. I was the absolute contrary and didn't think there was even a chance we'd bring him home.
Let me introduce myself... I am Mrs. McB, Married to Mr. McB. Mr. would say it was love at first site. I thought he was weird and gross. For a while. We were married in 2002 at a wedding we heard over and over was the best ever. I tend to agree. :) We moved in to our house on our first anniversary and life was amazing.
It wasn't long into our marriage that we wanted a baby and tried for a year or so to no avail. With very minimal infertility treatment we found ourselves pregnant in May of 2004. We were thrilled that, after seeking help from a doctor, we were pregnant so quickly.
On May 23, 2004 Mr. McB was in an accident at work. This accident could have been very, very bad (as in me raising this baby alone or much more serious injury) but he ended up with a severely injured left leg which was amputated above the knee later that night. Four days later I went to my first ultrasound alone at 6 weeks pregnant and we found out we were pregnant with triplets. At any other time in our lives I'm not sure how that news would have been received. But we desperately needed some good news after Mr.'s accident and this was 3x the good news as far as we were concerned.
My pregnancy was riddled with complication and Mr. was obviously dealing with his own recovery from his surgery and new life with a prosthetic leg. We took turns puking and feeling sorry for ourselves the summer of 2004.
Chomps, our oldest, was apparently really eager to meet us. He was born at 23 weeks 3 days (a healthy pregnancy lasts 40 weeks) in September 2004. At that point we were really unsure about the future. Mr.'s take was different than mine and he was confident Chomps would make it. I was the absolute contrary and didn't think there was even a chance we'd bring him home.
Eighteen days after Chomps was born, at 26 weeks, Cream pulled a similar stunt and got himsef delivered. My primary OB was actually out of town at the time and the standing doctor decided my pregnancy was over. Though Train tried as he may to remain warm and safe, he was born by c-section half an hour after Cream. To this day it is such a blessing that Train is a healthy, happy, developmentally appropriate little boy or I would second guess myself daily about the fight I didn't put up to delay the delivery a third time. I was so ready to be done with being pregnant. Or rather, ready to be done with feeling miserable on a drug called Magnesium Sulfate which effectively fends off labor - but makes you feel like you've been run over by a truck; ready to take a shower; ready to use a toilet for the first time in 21 days; ready to sleep in my own bed.
At the point of Cream and Train's delivery, Chomps was three weeks old and doing "well", considering. We were confident that Cream and Train would do even better. We were right.
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